Just plain bitchin’.

Posted: June 18, 2009 in bitching, work

angrycalvinI officially scheduled my Sabbatical yesterday, so there’s no take-backs. June 7th through August 1st, 2010. Yahfersheryoubetcha I updated my Google Countdown Gadget to reflect this date. 353 days and counting…

You guys, I tell you what, that Sabbatical can’t come fast enough. Thank the GOOD LORD I have vacation from 6/29 – 7/3, and again from 7/30 – 8/7. If I didn’t have that to look forward to on the near horizon I’d be bawling my eyes out at this very second.

Because bawling is what I do when I’m pissed.

Work. Is. Killing. Me. Every day – EVERY day – since we deployed that new system I’ve been talking about, I’ve been getting phone call upon phone call, e-mail upon e-mail, people plopping meeting requests on my calendar because, “HALP! I don’t know what I’m doing!” I respond to them in the exact same way every time: “Did you take the training?” 95% of the responses (and I WISH I was exaggerating) have been, “No.”

And so I put together a form e-mail to just send to anyone who needs help, instead of re-typing the same e-mail over and over (AND OVER). The VERY FIRST STEP is to take the training. Then I added some tips and tricks for how to navigate through the new system, in response to the recurring themes of the requests for help. There’s only three issues that everyone keeps asking for help on, and I put step-by-step instructions for how to get around those issues in the e-mail. In very. basic. language. With screen shots. And arrows. Like, “SAP for Dummies.” And yet they STILL want to set up a “quick” meeting (hah!), or just arrive at my desk, laptop in hand, wanting me to hold their hand and walk them through the process.

No joke, a half-hour ago I had SEVEN IM conversations going on at once, all from different people who couldn’t FUCKING READ, apparently, because if they HAD read the instructions I sent them, they wouldn’t need my help.

And then… OH, AND THEN… they just bitch and bitch and BITCH that the new system sucks and why couldn’t we keep the old system and who was responsible for how the new system works and WHY DIDN’T I MAKE SURE THEY MADE A USER-FRIENDLY SYSTEM?!? AS IF it’s MY fault that their poor little lives just got a little harder??? AS IF it was MY responsibility to make sure that a CORPORATE-WIDE piece of software was USER FRIENDLY?!? Are ANY of them????

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

:: FUME ::

On top of all of this is my actual, you know, DAY job. I’m covering for a co-worker for two weeks while she’s on vacation, and wouldn’t you know, AS SOON AS SHE LEFT THE BUILDING, the shit hit the fan. So add four more IM conversations to the seven I was dealing with: “Where’s my parts?” “Where’s this PO?” “We have lots on hold waiting for this shipment!” And I’m all, “I CAN’T MAKE DHL DRIVE THE TRUCK ANY FASTER.”

huff… puff… huff… puff…

There. I feel better, now.

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Comments
  1. Taoist Biker says:

    HAHAH! Thanks for the clip!

    I was watching Looney Tunes with Boy last night and we came across the one with Bruno, the Acrobatic Bear. When I started quoting ahead of the TV, Dys stopped and said “DUH! I should mail Laura, that would be a perfect tagline for her!”

    Bugs: “Yeah? Well, I’ll dive 500 feet into a damp sponge!”

  2. LL Cool Joe says:

    Glad to come here and find you in such a good mood. 😉

    Nothing like having a real good rant is there?

    You need a holiday mate! 😀

  3. crisitunity says:

    I am SO SORRY. Although I couldn’t help but laugh at :: FUME :: , because I know exactly, exactly what that exhale sounds like.

    Just remember, this too shall pass. We all had to get used to Windows 95 once. With the start button, you know? CRAZY.

  4. iamheatherjo says:

    There’s, like, eight liquor stores around the corner from my house. 😀

  5. Calvin says:

    Next time you feel this way remember what you felt like the weekend before the layoffs.
    Know this does not help but you have a great job and that is huge.
    And some growing pains are going to happen in stuff like this but the second someone states they did not do the training… that has been out for months just stop.
    They are the people that get the form letter with the links to the training and a copy of the email goes to their manager.
    The world is full of stupid people just look at all the complaints about the digital switch and we all know what a big surprise that was.

    • iamheatherjo says:

      I was one of the stupid people complaining about the digital switch. Not because it was a surprise. Because I really, really have no use for cable…or a new tv…or another stupid box thing attached to my ancient once perfectly functional analog tv. 😀

  6. rai says:

    Dood, I have SO been there. That’s one part I don’t miss about my old job. The eleventy-billion phone calls, the “I have a quick question” (that are never quick) drop bys and my favorite, the catch-em-right-before-they-enter-the-bathroom, “Can you come to my desk and show me how to do [insert task here]”. Really? Remember when I showed you two days ago and told you to take notes?

    Oh, apparently not.

    • Laura says:

      I totally just got ambushed. I called a woman who was having problems, turns out she had FIVE other people in the room with her who had “a quick question.” One hour of my life I’ll never get back.

  7. cariskicker says:

    Damn Laura, this sounds like my life in 3 months – except we pushed out our system deployment because we. are. lame.

    Sucks to be in the supply chain/strategic planning side of things and deploying a new system. And I JUST finished revising our work instructions and training docs.

    I’m SURE looking forward to doing that again. Oh, boy!

    May the days pass quickly until you hit vacation time. And may you win the lottery on your way back home. 🙂

    • Laura says:

      Oh lordy, we’re three weeks into deployment and our training docs aren’t fully updated. Not something I can impact, so I put together that “tips and tricks” e-mail until the official documentation is corrected.

  8. Kimmothy says:

    Work is so stupid, isn’t it? When I think about all the things I could be doing with my time instead of doing that every day, it makes me a little (a lot) sad.
    You would think since I work at a college with a bunch of academic, degree-holding types, that I wouldn’t be surrounded by idiots, right?
    You would be wrong.

  9. There’s some room here on the roof…just remove your clothes and bring a rifle.

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