1iconbangheadoncomputerI quite often catch myself yelling at the e-mails that I get from various suppliers and internal customers. Just now I yelled, “WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?” at an offending message from a clueless person. And then had to get up and walk away from my computer for a bit, before I not only YELLED it, but also TYPED it and clicked SEND.

It must be quite entertaining indeed, to be my cubicle neighbor.

Calvin sat next to me on the couch for most of the day yesterday. He was home sick, and it was my regularly scheduled telecommute day. Apparently I sigh a lot, mutter a lot, and occasionally blurt out an, “Idiot!” or “Moron!” Not at him, at the aforementioned offenders. Calvin likes to say, “The more people you put in a space, the more the asshole ratio goes up.” That applies to stupid people, too.

Lots of people work with, and for, AcronymCo, is all I’m saying.

———-

I’m pretty proud of myself. In the last fourteen days, I have worked out ten times. I’m working in weight training with cardio. Most favorite exercise? Triceps pulldowns. Least favorite? Pushups.

I fucking HATE pushups.

Because of the pollen count and subsequent HAVOC that it wreaks on my allergies, I’ve been sticking to the elliptical machine lately (indoors, natch) for my half-hour of cardio. Calvin has had to listen to snatches of random songs as I attempt to entertain myself with my iPod. I’m one of THOSE chicks that can’t NOT sing, a fact that causes Calvin pain, especially given the fact that 1) I’m rather atonal when I’m wearing headphones; and B) I don’t have enough breath to sing the whole song from beginning to end:

“…dun dun dun… Dun Dun Dun… DUN DUN DUN… oh let the sun beat down upon my face…”
:: pant ::
“…sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell…”
:: huff ::
“… see but I don’t get it, don’t you think maybe we could put it on credit…”
:: gasp ::
“… so don’t cry… one day all seven will die…”
:: wheeze ::
“… I feel so good if I just say the woooooord… su-sussudio! Just say the word, ooooohhhhhh…”

And so on. Poor, poor Calvin.

———-

I’ll leave you with this question: Bloody Mary’s – love ’em or hate ’em? Seems to me some people are just as passionate about “their” version of a BM (heh) as they are about their recipe for potato salad. I don’t get the draw, myself. I’ve had one or two in my lifetime, and always think to myself, “Why?” They were a fixture in my early childhood memories of my mother – and now I know it’s because she was hung over most weekend mornings. I can’t imagine pounding one of those things down while hung over. GAAAAAH. Anyway. The question comes up because Calvin and I went to brunch on Sunday, and the restaurant featured a Bloody Mary bar, about which the patrons were stupefyingly excited.

Just give me a nice Grand Marnier mimosa, and Get Thee Behind Me, tomato juice concoction from Hell.

———-

Apparently, the same jarring transitions I bring to my mix CD’s are carrying over into my writing, now.

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Comments
  1. Kim says:

    I’m very thankful I work behind closed doors for the very reason you described, except my walls are paper-thin so I still should curse under my breath. But I don’t.
    Good deal on the working out; I’m pretty happy with my walking progress lately and I think it’s kept me from climbing a bell tower with an automatic weapon. Always a plus. I laughed so hard picturing you singing with headphones on; I love doing that loudly and badly on purpose!
    I way prefer Mimosas over Bloody Marys, but I have to say this: I worked one summer in upstate NY at a diner and also a bar which means I pretty much stayed drunk all summer. One morning I was at work with the hangover from hell and my boss forced me to drink a BM, assuring me it was the miracle cure. True I came very close to horking it all back up, but miraculously I kept it down and it did the trick. For the rest of the summer that was my routine. Luckily before I crossed over into rampant alcholism, summer ended and I went back to real life. And haven’t had a Bloody Mary since.

  2. Taoist Biker says:

    I’m not generally a vodka fan in any form, really, so all vodka drinks are pretty much out the window for me. I have had a Bloody Mary that was fairly well done, I’ll admit (host made a pitcher in a situation in which it would be rude to refuse), but it didn’t make me want to order one ever again. Same for margaritas, really.

    Never tried a mimosa, and I think I’d better stay away so as not to ovulate or anything.

    I usually order a decent bourbon on the rocks, maybe with a Coke on the side. I can’t remember the last time I ordered a mixed drink. While I was patronizing the bar just down from my grad school dept, though, I was an aficionado of Blue Motorcycles (shock) and Green Dinosaurs. Honestly, the latter is better.

    • Laura says:

      I like vodka straight up, or with a twist. Also a big fan of Grey Goose Greyhounds. But, IMHO, tomato juice does not belong in alcohol. Some of the regulars at “our” bar drink beer with tomato juice or Clamato, which is TEH HURL.

      Cavin’s right there with the mimosa = ovulation theory.

      • iamheatherjo says:

        Grapefruit juice is wrong all by itself…Grey Goose can’t even make it taste good for me. Makes my face turn inside out. It’s NOT pretty.

        In complete agreement on Clamato = ICKY! ::shivers::

  3. iamheatherjo says:

    Don’t like Mimosas at all, but I DO like very spicy Bloody Marys. But I love vodka and I love tomato juice, put them together and I’m happy. They just have got to be spicy. I said so.

  4. “No” to the Bloody Mary’s…anything with the initials “BM” shouldn’t be put in your mouth.

    And…push-ups suck and are boring. You must find another exercise to replace this.

    • Laura says:

      Well, I’ve been doing chest/bench presses as well… either one are rather manly of me, don’t you think? :: strikes body builder pose ::

      • Taoist Biker says:

        [Hans]You are a leetle gurly-mahn.[/Hans]
        [Franz]Which is not guud, even if you AHRE a leetle gurl.[/Franz]

        I am a firm (insert joke here) believer in cable crossovers, but you’ve got to have a pretty big and well-equipped gym to have one. I never did before I came to work at the U. The trick is not to do like lots of guys do, lean way forward before you start…but stand straight up, and bring your fists together 6-8″ in front of your chest (or your belly, if you prefer), like you’re hugging a tree. Booyah!

        I tried something last night I’d always heard was murder but I’d never attempted…overhead squats. Holy crap! And that was just the bar!

  5. Kami-O says:

    Do benchpresses, I believe they do the same thing as a push up! LOLOL
    Why drink a drink that tastes like your drinking it without the alcohol? Either I have no taste buds or BM’s always seem to just simply taste like I’m drinking tomato juice straight..:/ hmmm…

    • Laura says:

      It’s funny, when I was young(er) I would have TOTALLY wanted a drink that didn’t taste of the alcohol… now I want to be able to. As is evidenced by my vodka-to-OJ ratio in my Screwdrivers…

  6. Lana says:

    One of the local places boasts that their Bloody mary is like a “meal in a glass” or something like that… They stick a couple of skewered cocktail shrimp and some celery and what-not in it… I am with ya on the Tomato juice should not be mixed with alcohol thing… Also something with the word Bloody in it ewww… I don’t like tomato juice to begin with tho. I am an ameretto sour girl.

  7. Sherry says:

    I prefer a Bloody Cesar to a Bloody Mary – so instead of tomato juice it’s clamato, which totally grosses a lot of people out. I like it with a squirt of Tobasco and Worcestershire, and it has to be in a glass that is thickly rimmed with celery salt.

    Today will be day three of the 30 Day Shred for me, and while I’m actually eagerly looking forward to doing it later during Breanna’s nap, I also worry that I’m just going to DIE halfway through. My calves are KILLING me from the jumping rope parts. Augh.

    • Laura says:

      Okay, GAH to the Clamato, again. Though, have you ever had Humptey Dumptey’s “Sour Cream and Clam” potato chips? NOM.

      I did Shred on Monday night, and my shoulders and thighs HATE me right now. I think I’ll only do it occasionally (like, once a week) to keep me from getting bored with my workouts. I’ve never gotten past Level One… I’m kind of afraid to.

  8. LL Cool Joe says:

    It must be a real delight hearing you sing along to songs with your headphones on! NOT! My older daughter raps along to Eminem, and it made me realise how good he really is.

    My partner drinks Bloody Mary’s. I’ve often wondered why.

    • Laura says:

      Hee! We often think we sing better than we really do. Thankfully, I have Calvin around to make sure I don’t get too confident in my own abilities.

  9. Kim says:

    Yeah, I had a cool boss.
    And grapefruit juice is the Devil’s piss.

  10. fishdreamer says:

    I like bloody marias, made with tequila instead of vodka (I don’t drink vodka), but they have to be spicy. My cousin makes the best ones. Lots of worcestershire, some hot pepper sauce, and I don’t know what all else. I don’t drink them anywhere else, I’m a bourbon girl. Give me manhattans and life is good.

    I used to work in cubeville and wore headphones to listen to music and filter out all the talking around me. I found out after about a year and a half that people two sets of cubes away could hear me swearing at my computer. Oops.

    • Laura says:

      Tequila and I have a love-hate relationship right now. Just the smell makes me want to gag, and I used to be able to toss back shots no problem. Then I had a BAAAAAAD Friday night that left me tossing my cookies all weekend long. ~shudder~

      Heh, MY cubemates comment on my SINGING while I’m wearing headphones (As in, “Is she ever going to SHUT UP?”), not the swearing. I try to keep it clean, then let loose at home and swear like a sailor.

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