Lazy Saturday

Posted: January 3, 2009 in Headspace, pets, weekend

1iconfootballWe’re watching the wildcard playoff game between the Cardinals and the Falcons. I don’t really have high hopes for the Cards – typical to Arizona teams, they take us right up to the verge of climactic satisfaction (heh), and then pull an Epic Fail and lose the lead in the fourth quarter. If they’re in the lead at all. Really, since the Cards clinched the playoff spot, they only won one game in the five (or was it four?) leading up to today’s game. So the fact that it’s 7/0 in favor of the Cards right this second (8:19 left in the first quarter) means nozzing. Nozzing, I tell you!

The Pats aren’t even in the playoffs this year, which removes any conflict I might have had between rooting for my emotional home team, and rooting for my physical home team.


Calvin and I went to see Bobby Collins at the Improv last night. I’d never seen/heard much of his stuff, so I went in with few expectations. He was hysterical, though – the epitome of the New York Jew, as he said so himself. He reminded me of my Long Island relations with the way he expressed himself.

I take deep exception to the Improv’s prices accompanying their “two drink minimum”. Nearly fifty dollars (tip included) for two beers, a shot, and two Bailey’s on the rocks (which were NINE DOLLARS EACH). On top of the cost of the tickets, you drop a cool $100 with very little effort. Fuckers.

The rest of the weekend will be spent very cheaply.


Poor Lucy is in desperate straights. She’s been digging around in her tank for weeks, which is a sign that she needs to lay but is not finding a spot to her liking. The last two lay cycles she was content to drop her eggs inside her hide box, but for some reason that’s not good enough for her this time around. So yesterday Calvin and I went hunting for vermiculite (found it in an obscure corner of Home Depot) to use as lay bedding. Then we decided to section off about a third of her tank to make into a semi-permanent lay box so we wouldn’t have to mess with another container or tank, so Calvin cut a piece of wood plank to fit into the tank and tacked it with RTV. After letting it set for a few hours, we filled one side with a deep bed of vermiculite. We moistened so it will hold its shape and allow her to fashion a little cave to her liking, then placed some fixtures for her to climb up/down from one side into the other (still filled with the normal pellet bedding, plus her basking log and food dish). She got the hang of the new arrangement right away, though there’s still no sign of her settling down and laying her damned eggs already.

I swear, I have become FAR more concerned with the eating, drinking, defecating, and laying habits of these darned critters than is healthy for a normal person. Lucy’s a good eater and pooper, but this laying business is getting frustrating. Cheeto is getting older so his eating habits are finicky, and he’s frequently constipated. I tell you truthfully, anyone who has had to stick a lubed q-tip up a lizard’s ass so it’ll poop has lost a little piece of their soul.

Bag Balm. It’s for more than just cow udders. Oh, how I WISH I were kidding.


I have written very little of consequence around here, lately. I don’t know if I’m avoiding any deep and meaningful subjects on purpose, or if I just have little of such subject matter to say. I think it’s the former – I’m on vacation mode and allowing my mind to skim superficially along the surface. Time enough starting Monday to get back to reality and start thinking the deep thoughts. Like how we’re going to address the next calendar year – financially, emotionally, motivationally.

Fuck it. Football’s on.

  1. Calvin says:

    Cards are having a great game today despite having to play against the refs also.
    Way obvious on the missed calls today and can I just say the Falcons coach is a asshole, whines at every play.
    Just once I would love to see a team call a play that went towards the sideline and smash the dirty player\coach or maybe watch a cheerleader get owned.

  2. kimmothy69 says:

    Colts lost to the Chargers last night. I quit football.

    I had a friend who was obsessed with Bag Balm and then got her boyfriend hooked on all its many strange and wonderful uses.

    I’m going back to work tomorrow after 20 days off. I’m crying deep down in my soul. Today the weather matches my soul; cold and raining. I’m wearing all black (sweats) and I feel like an emo teen.

  3. With one playoff win, this has to be a success for Arizona this year. Don’t get too disappointed if they bow out next week. They really have never figured out how to win away from home with ANY regularity. They’d better hope that they get to go to Carolina…it is cold in N.Y.

  4. Laura says:

    Calvin – I’m pretty sure that in a game of cheerleader vs. runningback, the runningback would win.

    Kim – That was a shocker, wasn’t it? Chargers have been TEH SUK all year. Ah well, at least Payton got MVP again. Pray, what “strange and wonderful uses” of Bag Balm do you know of? Back to work for me tomorrow, too, after having two weeks off. It’s tough, but at least we’re gainfully employed, right? Right?

    MTAE – Yeah, after they just shit the big one in NE a couple of weeks back (in the snow!), they obviously can’t play in the cold. Pussies.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s