Putting off the inevitable.

Posted: November 25, 2008 in Bring the funny, Home, pets, photography

Gah. It’s nearly 11:00 and I’ve gotten nothing useful done yet today. Calvin set the alarm for 8:00, but when it went off I was still suffering from the killer headache that started last night. So I re-set it for 9:00, took some Tylenol, and went back to bed. It went off at 9:00, I snoozed it. And snoozed it again. Then Calvin called, I chatted with him for a few minutes, then got up and made coffee and fixed myself some cereal and yogurt, fed the cats, gave the dogs water, fed the lizards, took a couple of pics (to follow), and now here I am.



I’m about ready to kill Oz. No, not really, and actually I’m watching his antics with a certain degree of fascination, to see what level of success he achieves.


See, last night when Calvin got home he replaced the light bulbs in the ceiling fixtures that you see in this picture. He also removed the a/c intake cover to rinse it off before replacing the filter (oh, I’m sure there’s technical terms, and him being an HVAC guy, I’m sure he’ll correct me in the comments). He ALSO replaced the garbage disposal, but that’s not pertinent to this story.

So. He left the cover out back to dry last night, and this morning Oz discovered that there’s a Hole! In the Ceiling! This morning, I’m sitting on the couch surfing the web and eating breakfast, when I hear this series of noises:

“Yeeeow! Yeow. MRRRROOOOWWW!”

I figured he was trying to get into one of the locked bedrooms upstairs, as usual. There are lever handles on the doors and he’s used to just popping up, grabbing on, and like magic the door opens. Unless, of course, it’s locked. Then he’s all, “But the Door! Is! Closed! I have to get in!”


So, I hollered an, “Oz, cut it out!” from the comfort of my ASS on the COUCH. Then I heard it again:

“Yeeeow! Yeow. MRRRROOOOWWW!”

I got up as quietly as I could, walked to the base of the stairs, and looked up. I observed Oz jump up on the banister, eyeball the hole(!) in the ceiling(!), wiggle his butt and swish his tail, LEAP into the air, SMACK into the wall opposite his perch, SLIIIIIIIIDE down said wall, and BANG to the floor. Then he sat there, meowed bitchily up at the hole(!), jumped back up on the banister, and tried it again.

I laughed. Then I grabbed the camera. Of course!


Since Oz is featured all over this site, but Zoe not so much, I thought I’d include a picture of her so she knows she’s loved too:



Finally, WHY are vitamins SO DAMNED HUGE? I mean, I take drugs (maaaan) that are these teeny tiny little things that PREVENT BABIES, and cure my allergies, and allow me to eat spicy foods, and allow me to NOT BE CRAZY. But these vitamins? Are YOOGE.


At 6:00 we have a multivitamin. At 9:00 and 12:00 we have glocosamine tablets. At 1:00 we have a calcium tablet. At 11:00 and 4:00 we have fish oil capsules. And at 3:00 we have a chromium tablet.

The dime is in there to give a size perspective. I don’t make it a habit of swallowing money.

I’ve been known to be able to take fourteen tablets at a time, but these puppies? I have to split up to swallow ’em all.

(Somebody’s going to make some sick joke about my capacity to swallow, I just KNOW it.)


Okay, I can’t excuse my slackardness anymore. Today’s agenda includes grocery shopping (two separate stores), cleaning the upstairs bathroom, cleaning the stairwell and banisters and walls and corners with All! The! Detritus!, detail cleaning our bedroom and bathroom, cleaning out the snake’s vivarium, and doodie duty in the back yard.


  1. Taoist Biker says:

    Oz clearly has Ceiling Cat aspirations.

  2. Kim says:

    And that right there is why I don’t take vitamins. Well that, and the smell.

  3. angelcel says:

    Your cats are gorgeous and Zoe….can I take her home with me?

  4. farmwife says:

    I hate trying to take those things. What do you do when you choke on them halfway down? Or when they don’t go down right and seemingly lodge in your chest cavity?

    I have to admit, I’ve fallen off the vitamin wagon and haven’t taken any in ages. I start boot camp tonight, so I guess I better dig some out….I’ll need it.

  5. crisitunity says:

    I have remarked on the giganticness of my fish oil capsules before, and I really don’t understand why so many vitamins are so large. My understanding is that the active ingredient in most pills is a tiny percentage of the pill’s volume anyway.

    I laffed at Oz’s antics.

  6. Uh….don’t swallow that one in the middle…unless you can crap out two nickels. It doesn’t look like a pill to me. Your husband might be trying to hurt you…and maybe even your cat too!

    Keep your eye on him.

  7. Laura says:

    TB – Heh. I thought about that as I wrote this. However, Oz is CLEARLY a basement cat at heart. The fucker.

    Kim – No B vitamins for me, no ma’am!

    Jayne – She is the sweetest thing ever, but SO darn clingy. She has to be ON you all the time. It’s sweet, but annoying sometimes. So, how about she comes to visit you, but comes home again when I start to miss her? That should take, oh, about a month. If we could only figure out the whole SHIPPING thing.

    Farmwife – Fortunately, I’ve never tossed them back up again after taking them. It’s been close a couple of times, though. And I almost ALWAYS swallow them sideways, which hurts like a sonofabitch.

    Crisitunity – I know! Do the marketers figure that we’ll be fooled into thinking their product is quality if it’s the size of a small zucchini??

    MTAE – Hah, that’d be some trick, huh? You could pitch a tent and charge admission. “Keep an eye on him…” My cat, or my husband? “Yes.” Also, see this site. Oz displays ever single sign.

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